The Poster

Sue (Annaliese Farnlucher), an aspiring playwright, enters – ready to write another page of total drivel

Neville (Chris Millard) 'strongly advises against that'

Here's 'the wife' Mary (Mel White) and 'the wife's sister' Liz (Karina Farnlucher)

Mary and Neville argue over the 'you know what's'

When they've gone, we see Tony (Mike Pennick) enter – and Sue gives him a bottle of wine for helping her with her awning the previous day

Jenny (Kathryn Witts) calls to Tony from their caravan …

… and eventually appears, tripping over a chip

Jenny wants coffee, and Tony brings coffee – for her and for Sue.
Meanwhile she's trying to unravel knots in his kite string – and breaks a nail

Neville comes to the rescue with some superglue to mend Jenny's nail – but only succeeds in getting himself stuck to her
– and the scene ends with him hauling her off towards his caravan where a fire has mysteriously started.

The scene opens with Tony flying his stunt kite. Neville is occupied preparing his annual barbeque.

Tony asks Neville to fly his kite while he reaches for a beer
– but although Neville assures everyone he can do it because 'he once had a box kite', it gets out of control
and crashes into the camp offices with a crash of broken glass

Neville says he'll go to the camp office 'to settle it'
The girls meanwhile carry on nattering stage right

Liz gets fed up with Mary talking about her as if she wasn't there
– and storms out telling them all to 'go to hell'.
Mary convinces the others that Liz will try suicide.

Neville is preoccupied with lighting his barbeque – until Mary attacks him with sausages on skewers.
The scene ends with Jenny beginning to enjoy herself for the first time!

It's evening with the search for Liz still on.
Neville, however, is preoccupied with a raunchy novel that Jenny has left lying around – until she catches him at it.

Mary arrives in night attire telling Neville to join the search for Liz

Tony found Liz paddling on the beach – and had plunged in to save her even though he couldn't swim.
Now they're back at the camp trying to keep warm.
Eventually they hide in Sue's caravan.

Mary has found Neville 'skulking around the back of the toilets' and is not best pleased with him …

… but it's time for the worm to turn, and Neville sits her down and gets out his list of questions to ask, starting with:
"Do you believe me to be a dull and dreary person?"

Mary's having none of it, and says she's going to bed

Neville asks Jenny for some water …

… to make sure the barbeque is out properly.
She asks where Tony is, and Neville tells her he's in Sue's caravan

Sue arrives from the search for Liz, and Jenny confronts her

She knocks at the door of Sue's caravan telling Tony to come out …

… which he does, wearing nothing but a towel

He denies having been in there with Sue, because he was in there with Liz – who now appears, also wearing nothing but a towel.
Blackout!!

Tony has been thrown out of his caravan by Jenny and is packing his clothes.
Neville trots in, now a changed man wearing garish shorts and T-shirt, and having been for a run

He asks Tony what exercises he should do to get himself in 'tip-top shape'
Tony recommends a few press-ups …

… followed by a few sit-ups – "But you are required to move, Nev"

Sue thinks even she could manage what she's seen – but it's all too much for Neville …

… and he's still bent double when Mary arrives telling him to take his ridiculous shorts off

Neville hobbles off to settle up at the camp office, while Mary warns Tony about Liz's 'problem' with men

Tony and Jenny talk through their issues …

… and she forgives him

… but just a minute – what's this?

Liz has wheedled her way into Tony's life by having Jenny invite her to stay with them!

Meanwhile, Neville is back from the office having paid for the damage done by the kite in Act 1
– and Tony tells him he can keep it

Mary is back, having been told about Sue not coming home with them, and is not best pleased

She tries to persuade Sue to change her mind, but all in vain

Sue gives Neville a chaste kiss, and heads for the shops …

… but Neville gets short shrift when he tries his luck with Mary!

Jenny and Tony are leaving …

… but before they do, Jenny leaves her mobile number with Sue asking her to give it to Liz

Mary has seen this and steals the note back, telling Neville to hide it in his sock

… but after Mary has left giving Neville 'two minutes' to come to the car, he gives the note back to Sue

Then, with a gleam in his eye, he asks Sue to help him get the stunt kite into the air
– and the scene ends with him succeeding, apparently flying it through seagulls!

So the play ends as it began, with Sue trying to write a play – but now with some new ideas!

The cast take their bow at the dress rehearsal …

… then listen with trepidation to the Director's notes. But it was alright on the night!